Where Are Your Wings?

I love butterflies.  I have actually had an obsession with them since I was 17 years old. One day, I was sitting under a tree journaling, praying, and crying out to the Lord on my college campus. I asked the Lord for some sort of sign to confirm that He was listening to me. And no sooner than I had finished praying, a huge gust of wind came and shook the leaves off of the tree . One landed directly on my face as if to wipe my tears away.  I was overwhelmed by this great sense of peace. And then, I saw a butterfly. And from that day forward, I’ve been obsessed with them.  Every time I’ve seen a butterfly since then, I’m immediately reminded that the Lord hears me and I feel an invitation to pray.

The coolest thing about butterflies is the process of metamorphosis. During their time in the cocoon, the caterpillars are undisturbed. Nothing goes in and nothing comes out. And when they emerge, they come forward clothed in something we didn’t see them go into the cocoon with: wings.

The butterfly's ability to sprout wings doesn't develop over time and isn't given to them by another insect. It lies dormant inside of them when they are caterpillars. But, it takes time and solitude to begin the process of transformation. And more than that, it takes courage and strength to come out of a familiar place and reveal to the world their true form.

This process is evidence that some transitions are not meant to break you, but they are meant to reveal what was inside of you all along.

A TIME OF SOLITUDE AND REFLECTION

I have been very quiet over these last few months.  Mostly because I was participating in a course that would allow me to become a licensed and ordained minister.  The course was several weeks long and I wanted to take the time to truly reflect on the weight and sacredness of that this moment carried. So, I embraced the stillness and used this time as an opportunity to reflect. And on last Sunday, myself, along with my 9 amazing classmates, became licensed and ordained ministers.

These last few weeks have been the most revelatory and internally transformative weeks of my life.  I know that that’s a huge assertion, but I mean it.  I have honestly learned so much about transition, about myself and about the Lord.

THE PURPOSE OF TRANSITION

I’ve talked a lot about my move from Indiana to Tennessee and what I believed this transition was supposed to be for me.  I thought it was an opportunity to start over. I thought that I was supposed to use this time to reinvent myself.  Become a brand new Ariona. And, if I can be honest, that has not been working out very well for me. 

I have tried to leave so much of what I believed made me me behind.  I left my ambitions for my career behind. I left my hobbies and creativity behind. And I told myself that I was done with ministry.  I was letting my fears, my disappointments and even my own assumptions counsel me right into a pretty little box. I thought that there was safety in the shadows and that my silence was what this season was calling for.  I truly had convinced myself that it was time for me to shrink.  

NO MORE SHRINKING

This past Sunday’s ordination was a public representation of what has been shifting on the inside of me since I moved.  I have consistently been asking myself, “Ariona, who do you believe that you are and what do you believe you’re called to do?”  

If you’re not careful, you’ll let your losses and even your location, define you.  But the truth of the matter is, the same quirky, talented, creative, strong willed woman that left Indiana was the same woman who had made her way to Tennessee. Did you know that butterflies and caterpillars carry the same DNA? The butterfly is simply a more mature expression of what the caterpillar always had the capacity to become.

And this is where I found the lesson.

Some transitions happen not for the purpose of reinvention, but for the purpose of revelation.  

FRESH PERSPECTIVE

As I sobbed on that platform and reflected on how far the Lord has really allowed for me to come, I’d truly never felt more like a daughter in Christ in my life. And as a daughter, I have rights, I have an inheritance, and my identity is solidified.

When I left the platform, I began to think to myself, “I wonder what else God is not done with?” I had to look at all the parts of myself that I had been hiding away.  I had to ask myself, where are your wings Ariona? What promises from God have I simply stopped waiting for? What else have I placed in a box or let sit silently in the shadows?

And now I’m asking you that same question.  Where are your wings friend?  What parts of you have you refused to share with the world because you’re unsure that you’ll be accepted?  What have you been talking yourself out of doing, out of creating or out of becoming? What have you stopped believing God for?

Little caterpillar, it's time to sprout wings. This is the season and the time to embrace all that make us who we are.  This is the time to fully stand up under the weight of the power, wisdom, truth and creativity that we carry.  Don't avoid the quiet seasons; they'll develop you. And when the time is right, don't be too afraid to step out of the cocoon and show the world who you truly are.

No more shrinking back. No more hiding. No more being fearful of whether you'll be accepted or not.  Our steps are ordered, our lives are aligned and it’s time to come forth!  I’m excited for your transition. I can’t wait to see what you produce.  I’m looking forward to seeing your wings friend.   We’re waiting on you. 

For your consideration,

A butterfly who just found her wings

For [even the whole] creation (all nature) waits expectantly and longs earnestly for God’s sons to be made known[waits for the revealing, the disclosing of their sonship].

Romans 8:19